Tag Archives: photography

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Reaction

On Monday I walked with a group of friends. First I walked down from my house to the coffee shop, walked with them, walked back. It was cold but I was well layered. I want to see if I can up my exercise in spite of Long Covid and muscle weirdness. The initial reaction was fatigue. I took a nap on the couch from 2 to 6 pm and then went to bed at 7. I woke at 5. Fourteen hours of sleep.

That is not totally reassuring. Tuesday I did not feel particularly sore or tired. Wednesday, though, was bad. I started have muscle aches all over and I could not get my hands or feet warm. I lay down under an enormous pile of blankets and eventually went to sleep, starting at about 2 pm. I woke at 9 pm and then went back to sleep, warmer but aching, until 4 am. So that is another 14 hours.

This morning nausea and headache, but less soreness.

So, here is an article: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-023-44432-3 about the post-exertional malaise in people with Long Covid. They took people with Long Covid, matched them with people who have recovered from Covid-19, and then did muscle biopsies in both groups before and after maximal exercise. Results? “We show that skeletal muscle structure is associated with a lower exercise capacity in patients and that local and systemic metabolic disturbances, severe exercise-induced myopathy and tissue infiltration of amyloid-containing deposits in skeletal muscles of patients with long COVID worsen after induction of post-exertional malaise.”

Both groups were healthy before Covid-19 and physically active. The study uses many different techniques to measure muscle oxygen use and look at the muscles themselves at the microscopic level. As previous studies have shown, none of our current imaging, like x-rays and CT scan and MRI, can see the problems. This is at a microscopic and cell level in the muscles.

So I am having a post-infection or Long Covid flare the last couple of days, because I pushed too far against my limits. They have not done brain studies but the suspicion is that something similar has been going on. I have been spending a lot of time contacting temp companies and doing job searches, so I am going to take a few days off from that as well. Let the brain and muscles heal.

I still think of Long Covid as immune system PTSD, where the immune system is trying to protect me from further infection, though not necessarily in a way that I like. If the immune system makes me stay home and rest, well, I shouldn’t catch anything, right? Our immune systems are as diverse and complicated as we are, so the patterns are highly variable.

My immune system can’t bamboozle me. It wants me to stay home and take it easy. I get the message. Have a wonderful day.

Cats respond to drugs differently too. Sol Duc is quiet and contemplative on catnip. Elwha, well, guess.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: bamboozle.

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Envy

I am supposed to write about envy
but what I am feeling is grief
I walked five miles yesterday
and it was fun, talking, a group
but then a nap from 2 to 5, three hours
and to bed at seven pm and up at five
so 13 hours sleep in response to exercise

It is time to downsize what I think I can do
I still have my mind, but the energy is halved
I can’t work full time as a physician
and I am not sure I can work half time
Do I try it? The risk that I crash again?
Pneumonia and death? Or do I curl into the grief
and find something else to do.

Even the thought makes me tired.

Not envy of other doctors, oh, maybe a little
but the truth is, my survival to date is something
of a miracle. Babies with mothers with active tuberculosis
usually die very quickly, infected, overshelmed.
My mother kindly coughed blood so the doctors knew
before I was born, from the protection of the womb
to the protection of the family, away from my mother.
She is dead, my father is dead, my sister is dead
so even if I cannot work half time
it’s still miraculous to be here at all.

I hope that each and every one of you
feels the miracle of not being dead and gone
some days. And that you do not envy
your dead.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: envy.

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Give love

Martin Luther King’s birthday and a federal holiday. To be blunt, we need to stop killing each other and hating each other. And an awful lot of hate is based on fear: fear of others, fear of losing money or status or standing.

Give love.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: blunt.

The photograph is from September 2022, from my road trip with my friend Maline Robinson. She is second from the right in the photograph. We visited her in-laws in Beloit, Wisconsin on a road trip, going to visit her old friends and family. Her husband George Harrell had died of lung cancer in 2015. Maline died in February 2023.

I am the short one, in the skirt.

Let peace and love spread over the world, justice and an end to discrimination.

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The numbers game #4

Here is my first try at Judy’s numbers game. The number is 125. I got over 300 photographs with that entry, so that’s a bit many to post. Many are of birds or our beautiful Salish Sea. And bowling, heh.

The first is from December 2018, of the ferry from Port Townsend to Whidby Island at sunrise.

Reflections off of North Beach. A storm was rolling in, but the sun was still lighting the clouds, which in turn lit the water. December 2018.

Taken at Fish Park in Poulsbo, February 2022.

Bowling, November 2021.

Napping. February 2023.

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1932 Letter

My cousins sent me a packet of letters. Some are from my mother to her mother, but this one is from… well, see if you can guess.

Dear Mother and Father,

We got in the car and Grandfather and me sat in front and Grandmother sat in back. Grandmother said, “Do you want your window closed?” and I said, “No.” Then, in a few minutes after that I said, “I am getting kind of chilly.” Then in a few minutes after that I tumbled over the back of the seat into the back seat. Then I shot my pistol out the window and tried shutting it again but it wouldn’t go. Then I waited awhile and then I shot off my pistol again and it worked. Then I shot off my pistol again in a few minutes after that but somehow it didn’t work. And then after awhile it started raining.

Then we got home. After a little while Eva May came over. Then after awhile Jimmie came. Jimmie brought over his gun with him. He had a long gun.

After supper I took my sparklers over to Jimmy’s and Eva May’s house. They invited me over before supper and then I started lighting my sparklers. I lit one after another and in a few minutes I said, “I’ll go over and get my pistol,” so I did.Then I went back for awhile and then I came home and stayed and we had the rest of my sparklers in the house. And then we all went to bed pretty early.

This is postmarked July 6, 1932 Decorah, Iowa. It cost .03 cents in stamps to mail. It was sent to Mrs. Temple Burling, 3434 Arden Ave, Hollywood, Illinois. The handwriting is quite beautiful. The letter is signed “Bobby” in quite different handwriting. The letter was sent from “Bobby” — Robbins Burling, age 6, as the narrator, with one of his grandparents transcribing to his mother (my grandmother) Mrs. Temple Burling (Katherine White Burling). I think it is a charming letter and so like a kid, with the repeats: “and then in awhile”. I am going to send it to “Bobby’s” grandson, who now has a child of his own. Here is the rest:

In the morning I got up and got dressed. Before I got up I was real quiet because I thought they were asleep because they were so quiet and they thought I was asleep because I was so quiet. Then finally they came past the door and when I knew – it they were awake – and they knew it – I was awake. And then I got up and got dressed.

Then after breakfast Grandmother and me went out and weeded. In a few minutes I said, “I’ll get the hay off the lawn for you.” so I did. I told her if she thought it was worth a penny and Grandma said, “Yes.” And then I said, “Do you think it’s worth any more than a penny?” and Grandma said “Yes.” In a few minutes we came in and she gave me a cent.

I left the penny in my hand and Jimmie came over and called me and we decided that we would make giant fingers and then as we were making giant fingers we decided we would make funny masks but we didn’t. We decided to make Chinamen’s hats but we didn’t.

Jimmie wore his hat in a funny pointed way and I wore mine with a round hole in the middle and kind of crooked too. And we went out to scare the girls and at first we didn’t scare girls but we scared Jimmie’s mother and we didn’t scare the girls after all. He went out to scare a man and he told me he’d be back and I got an idea while he was gone but he didn’t appear.

And then we went out and did some errands – got some peanut butter and then went to the library to see if they had any Dr. Doolittle books and they did. At first they asked if we’d read Dr. Doolittle at the Circus and I said, “I have.” and they put that back and looked some more and found another and asked me about that and it was called Dr. Doolittle and the Movie. Then at night Grandma read me some. We read part of it while I was in bed and then I started talking to Sixen and fell asleep finally and work up next morning. Then we had breakfast and I raked some more and I got another penny.

Bobby

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: letter.

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Cat tv

The hummingbirds were very hungry in yesterday’s 17 degree weather. At first Front Anna looked disheveled and fluffed up and miserable, but she cheered up considerably after breakfast. I filled my squirrel chewed bird feeders too. I put a warm scarf on each of my desks in front and we had a nice day of cat tv. My house was built in 1930 and it is not well insulated. Usually it’s not bad, just cooler upstairs, but in this cold it comes through all the walls and windows, storms or not.

But the cats watched the feeder tv quite happily. I took them out in harnesses and they decided to come back in quite soon. I don’t think they minded the snow, but they did not like the cold at all.

And the sun came out.