….I wore the oxygen all night and I swear that every cell, including all the probiotics, antibiotics, conbiotics, unclebiotics and even the amateurs were so happy. They all relaxed in a pile and snuggled, bathed in oxygen.
For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: security.
How can light on water be security? What is secure?
When I think of security, I think outdoors. The ocean will change and change and change, moment to moment and day to day. The light changes with each wave and the wind. But the ocean is still present. And water also represents the unconscious for me. All the things under the surface, all that depth, an infinite place of exploration: the water, the earth, the sky, the universe. For me, security is the internal exploration and the outdoors, which is so vast, there for me always. The poetry of nature.
the virtue of the disconnect
as a child
they say we are broken
he wakes at night
what was your childhood like?
how did you sleep?
it was not safe
we had to get up
leave in the night
you survived your childhood
yes, I did
sleeping lightly saved you
yes, it did
you could rewire that
it takes a lot of time
to change the childhood wiring
or you could just
with sleeping lightly
I am in RainShadow Chorale. My father was one of the people who started it in 1997. I moved to Port Townsend in 2000, because my mother had cancer. She died in May of 2000. My father died in 2013. I had the joy of singing with him in this group for 13 years.
Our concert is weekend after next and I really love this one. We are doing a wild mix of pieces and moods with the theme from a Walt Whitman poem. In this time of so many people being afraid and angry and stirred up, going to chorus is healing. All of these people, unpaid, coming together to create these two concerts of beauty and unity and joy. A gift to each other and a gift to the community.
Ticket information on the website.
For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: object. I strenuously and loudly object to medicine meaning pills.
During my three months temp job at a nearby Army Hospital in 2010, I wanted to work with residents, Family Practice doctors in training. I finished residency in 1996 and have worked in rural clinics and hospitals for 14 years. I want more rural family practice doctors and I agitated to work with the residents in training.
The Family Practice Department had actually hired me to do clinic. They are swamped and trying to hire temporary and permanent providers as quickly as they can. Six different temp companies called me about the same job, so the word is definitely out.
Initially the department head explained that I was there to do clinic, but she changed her mind. I was cheerful about the electronic medical records. Learning a new electronic medical record is awful, but I was happy to be there, excited about working with residents and in a hospital more than 16 times as big as my usual small town hospital. Most importantly, I was patient with the computer. I have finally realized that computers don’t actually speak English. They speak computer and they are dumb as rocks and they make no effort to understand what I am saying. They don’t care. So it is no use getting mad at the dumb thing when it crashes or when it doesn’t do what I want: I have to go find someone who knows the exact language that the stupid machine will understand.
Since I was cheerful, my department head let me do what I want. I was on the clinic schedule every day, but it was empty. I would arrive and see walk-in active duty people from 6:30 to 8:00. At the same time, I would email the department head and ask what I was doing that day. Half the time, a physician was sick or had a family crisis, so she would move people around and put me with the residents. If not, I would open clinic.
I enjoyed the “Attending Room” duty. Family Practice Residents have their MD but then go through three years of training. The first year residents must precept every clinic patient. That is, they see the person and then come discuss the case with the faculty. Second year residents were required to precept two patients per half day and third year residents had to do one; and all obstetric cases were precepted.
Back when I was in residency and the dinosaurs roamed the earth, no one ever read any of my notes. This has changed. Every note that is precepted must be read by the attending and co-signed. After three years hating the electronic medical record that my small hospital bought, it was very interesting to see a different system. In some ways it was better and in some worse.
We had one or two “Attendings” in the faculty room, no more than three residents per attending. One case stands out, more because of the resident than the patient. He was a first year.
He described an elderly woman in her 80s, there for headaches. Two weeks of headaches, getting a bit worse. History of present illness, past medical history, medicines, allergies, family history, social history and the physical exam. He said, “She’s tried tylonol and ibuprofen, but they aren’t helping that much.” He frowned. “She doesn’t seem to want another medicine.”
“No?” I said.
“No.” he said. “I started to talk about medicines. It doesn’t sound like migraines and she doesn’t have anything that’s really worrisome for a tumor……but she doesn’t seem to want a headache medicine.”
“Why is she really here?”
He looked more confused. “What do you mean?”
“Why is she really here?”
“I don’t know.”
“You already said why. Think about the history.” He frowned. I said, “Ok, you said that she was worried that she was going to have a stroke. Are these headaches likely to be a precursor of a stroke?”
“Right. But that is why she’s here, because that is what she’s worried about. Look at her blood pressure, see what her last cholesterol was, talk to her about what symptoms ARE worrisome for strokes. Find out if a family member or friend has had a recent stroke. She doesn’t need a medicine. She is here for reassurance.”
“Oh.” he said. He left and came back.
“How did it go?”
“She was happy. She didn’t want a medicine. Her blood pressure is great, her cholesterol is great, we talked about strokes and she left.”
“That’s real medicine. Forget the diagnosis if the visit seems confusing. Ask yourself what is your patient worried about? What are they afraid of? Don’t focus on giving people medicine all the time. Ask yourself, why are they really here?”
And that is why I wanted to work with residents. It’s not all diagnosis and treatment. It is people and thinking about what they want and what they are worried about.
Why is she really here?
previously published on everything2.com
According to dictionary.com, precept is a noun. Medical school and residency have verbed it. Hey, get updated, dictionary.com!
every time I turn something off
I turn the television off in 2011
I turn Facebook off for a while
I turn the computer off every morning
I turn the radio off
the stereo off
the lights off
the heat off
I listen to the wind
I feel the wind
she is present
she touches me back
For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: blast.
Mondane Monday #180: fall coral.
These are coral mushrooms. J said he can’t remember which color is edible so we didn’t eat any. We saw yellow and white too. We were on the Tunnel Creek trail in the Olympic National Forest.
Fall coral could be color or coral or …. something else. Message your blog or do a pingback if you want to join! I will list the entries next Monday.
Last Monday was Without words.
KL Allendorfer wrote Wordless Cat, with lots of photographs!
For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: brace.
My sister was an extroverted feeler.
In fourth grade, she started getting sick a lot. My mother noticed a pattern. My sister was sick on Monday. She was avoiding school like crazy.
My parents were having difficulty figuring it out. EF’s grades were great. She was unhappy.
Then my parents went to a parent teacher conference.
My mother told this story: “The teacher said that EF came to her desk and asked to borrow a paper clip. Later, she came and asked to borrow a second paperclip. The teacher then produced the two paper clips. “Your daughter made braces with the paperclips. For her teeth!” The paperclips were bent.
“Um. Don’t you think that is sort of creative?” asked my mother.
“No.” said the teacher.
My mother would laugh telling the story and say, “After that, I pretty much let EF miss every Monday. I would not have wanted to go to school with that teacher either.”