Laid bare

My mind and heart talk daily, argue back and forth.
They takes sides on everything and often disagree.
Why is this such a threat to some, what crooked course
makes them hate my inner talk with such intensity?
I thank you for the clarity, discussion and the clues.
The angry bear that attacks you in your sleep.
I see the split and wonder what to do.
The bear protects your heart, hidden deep.
I hug the bear and monsters through bars of steel.
The silly mind thinks feelings are controlled.
Buried and locked away but every day more real.
Under horror, grief and pain lies the gold.
Each must heal the split by going in alone
Invite the bears and monsters of the heart to come back home.

Stone heart

My mind is done and unsurprised. My heart a stubborn rock.
My heart does not give up: loves where it loves. It doesn’t care
about reality or whether it is derided or mocked.
My mind moves on and kicks my heart, wondering where
this tenacity stems from. My heart is done with tears.
It agrees to new friends and joys in dance.
When my mind says forget, my heart jumps and steers
my body into a warrior fighting stance.
My mind is cynical and laughs and derides my heart.
I let them fight back and forth every day.
I cannot reach an end unless I start
to honor my feelings, the heart must hold sway.
My mind moves on, ignoring what you do.
Yet my stubborn heart remains a friend, strong and true.

Beach finds

I picked this agate up. See how it looks like a Gummi Bear, a different texture than the other rocks? The clear ones light up when the sun is polarized. It is harder to find them when it is not sunny.

This is not an agate, but some agates are this color. I try not to bring occupied houses home.

This is an agate too, not clear, but lovely color and striping.

Here is another clear one:

I am not the only creature searching the beach.

These were taken on Marrowstone Island and on the beach below Chetzemoka Park in Port Townsend.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: find.

Time ripples

I found this calcedony nodule on North Beach about a week ago. The lines in it are layers laid down over years and years, as the mineral crystals lined a space and precipitated. The different colors in the stripes mean different impurities. This is one of the biggest pieces that I’ve found on the beaches here.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: ripple marks.

Sometimes wise

Sometimes the wisest thing to do
is to refuse to watch the news
to go for a walk alone
and then go quietly home

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: wise.

Quieting the sympathetic fight or flight state to the parasympathetic relaxed state: http://www.wisebrain.org/ParasympatheticNS.pdf.

This is one of the pieces Rainshadow Chorale is working on:

Agate again

I found this agate on Marrowstone Island yesterday. Very clear and just lying on the sand!

The weather was a bit threatening. I was not sure it would stay sunny and I was not sure I wouldn’t get rained on. I did get a spattering of rain on the way back, but not very much. Good thing too, because I was out without a hat and in my down jacket rather than rain gear. Silly me.

It was a beautiful beach walk.

And why do the seals lie tail up and head up? Are they doing yoga? Are they tired of cold water? Are they sea sick?

That is a second seal in the water. Wondering when there will be room for two? The tide is not out far enough yet!

There were very few other people. I saw four as I arrived and two as I left and that is all.

Don’t come back

I wish you weren’t coming back. Ever.
I don’t want to see you here again.
I drive down to the beach thinking never.
If your car was there, I would park you in.
That makes me laugh out loud at how absurd
my stupid heart is longing all the time.
Hurt and vengeful, all those words
for a heart in tears. You won’t change your mind.
My pessimistic side growls I don’t care.
And thinks up gruesome ends for you.
It’s sad that you’ll be torn up by a bear
or eaten by Sasquatch in a stew.
Just think, at last you’ve managed to be free
From one thing always. It happens to be me.

Sonnet 13

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: pessimist.

Rules

On each new site we read the rules anew.
Check that we are not a bot and real.
Check that we will not link to porn or views
traumatic, that we promise not to steal
others work or game or avatar. Why is it
that in each site of any and every ilk,
someone has to watch and delete the bit
where the rules are broken, spilling milk.
The truth is we’ve learned how to behave
or rebel in neglected or violent homes.
I wonder if humans should be saved
when again the trolls must be stoned.
We think that humans should dwell on Mars.
We’ll need rules and moderators in the stars.

Sonnet 12

I think of you as dead

I think of you as dead.
Love is not dead, not mine for you.
This is not respectful to those
truly dead. Yet you are dead to me
in that you lie and say forever.
Torched and ashes, now it’s never
and the real you is dead to me.
I love the you that made a different choice,
that loved me back. He holds my hand
and walks with me and laughs with me
daily. And there is nothing you can do
to stop him and me. If anyone asks, you are dead
to me, dead forever, and I will love
whoever my heart chooses, for all time.

________________________________

I found the chalcedony nodule on Indian Island yesterday.