Concord

my heart is broken
love doesn’t conquer all
unselfish love
unreturned
unrequited
opens me to wound after wound
some turn from love no matter what
cling to the lies they tell themselves
cling to the poison they embrace
turn from love into the uncaring bottle
turn from love into the insensate smoke
turn from love even to the grave

I wish my heart would let them go
and heal

__________________

My friend Liz took the photograph, half way through the Rainshadow Chorale concert last Sunday.

Friends forever no matter what

My small child self is happy
Happy inside
She loves who she loves
Living or dead
In contact or fled
Distant or close
She loves who she loves
And I hold her close

My adult self is happy
Happy inside
I love who I love
And the world is so wide
Living or dead
In contact or fled
Loving forever
No matter what happens
I love who I love
My heart holds them close

My small child grieved losses
I hold her close
She loves them all
I guard her from most
She stays friends forever
No matter the grief
She is happy in loving
Her loves shine as stars
The ones who are hurtful
Are loved from afar
She’s held and she’s loved
And her love sings unmarred

_______________________________________

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: dogwood and for Mother’s Day. Mine died 25 years ago.

Chorus again

Rainshadow Chorale sang the Rachmaninovff All Night Vigil yesterday and we get to sing it again today! It is so gorgeous. Exhausting too. The rhythms are unfamiliar, the measures are all different lengths, the time changes all over the place and it’s in the formal Church Slavonic language from 1915.

I still loved singing it and will enjoy it today. Here is the 12th of 15 movements.

My daughter took the photograph in March, 2020, before lockdown.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: chorus.

All night vigil

Rainshadow Chorale is getting ready for our fall concert. Amazing music! One hundred pages of Rachmaninoff in Russian! I have been practicing remotely, using the recorded choral practices on Facebook, MP3s, language recordings, and my flute to practice tricky sections until they are earwormed into my brain.

The concerts are on Saturday and Sunday, three weekends from now, November 2 and 3, at First Presbyterian Church at 4:00 pm in Port Townsend, Washington. I leave soon to drive back there, cat and all. I think Sol Duc has learned some Russian too.

Here is one of the 15 parts. I like the title: Blessed Be the Man. It makes me think that this is Russian rap music. Actually, I think the whole thing sounds like angels singing in Russian. This is the first time I sing in Russian, but it’s the time that is particularly tricky. Rachmaninoff doesn’t care a bit about time signatures so some measures have eight beats, others twelve, others ten. Count, count, count.

I am using this for the Ragtag Daily Prompt: burgundy, both because of the poster colors and because the music and language is so rich and complex.

Come to the concert if you are anywhere near by!

Distant mesas

I have been in Grand Junction since the end of April. The Grand Valley really has amazing visual distances from one end of the valley to another, and even though it is a valley, it is at 4600 feet above sea level. It is surrounded by higher mesas and mountains in all directions.

Soon I drive back to Washington for a few weeks. That is a distance, too, 1200 miles with Sol Duc cat. She doesn’t really enjoy the car. I wonder if she will enjoy going home. Will she like the cloud settling over us, as if the bottom of it is grazing the roof tops? I did not like those clouds when I first moved to Washington but now they feel as if they enfold us and comfort us, an intimacy with the sky.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: distant.

We learned this song as kids:

Reason

Dr. Suess has a ruse
that disguises when he pats a moose
He’s teasing that the hidden reason
Is the looming change of season
Locks the box, rocks the docks
Fox in socks, equinox.

We do have concerts on the docks in Port Townsend in the summer. Not in the winter, the instruments get wet. This is the Pourhouse, which is also right on Port Townsend Bay, in August 2022.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: equinox.

Betty Ford’s

I met my daughter at Betty Ford’s on Saturday. No, not the rehab, Betty Ford’s Alpine Gardens in Vail. Vail is about half way between us. We found lunch at the Farmer’s Market, walked the gardens, and shared a banana split. My daughter was laughing by the end of it. “None of my friends are still eating at the end of a banana split, mom. You and my brother are the only ones who can keep up!” We walked over six miles and yum, how often do I have a banana split?

The gardens are not huge, but the alpine flowers are beautiful and from all over the world.

We heard music too, since the gardens are right next to the amphitheater. Robert Plant and Alison Kraus were warming up and doing their sound checks. My daughter was underwhelmed.

This looks beautiful and peaceful, but the Farmer’s Market is big and was packed with people. We were pretty much out of the range of Robert Plant at this point, but he accompanied us much of the way.

I heard it on the radio! Well, no, I found it on Youtube.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: radio.

Shapes and songs

The Ballad of the Shape of Things is one of those songs that I learned very young and from my cousins, so I did not know who recorded it. Another “dead girl song” only this one is a “dead guy song”. I loved the puns: “They say he died of the chickenpox. In part I must agree, one chick too many had he.” I also liked songs with words I didn’t know: transom, in this one. We were fairly bloodthirsty kids and happily learned songs about death, unfaithful lovers, murder, betrayal, noble suicide to save the highwayman, and so forth. My Darling Clementine, another dead girl song. We had a very educational childhood in song.

We needed the triangular “garment thin that fastens on with a safety pin” explained at the end of the song, because the cloth diapers we’d experienced were rectangular. I find memorizing things that rhyme and especially if there is a story and a tune, much easier than memorizing the varied side effects of drugs such as ACE inhibitors. The story behind the side effects escapes me, though maybe there is one! Think of that, a ballad of the ACE inhibitors, with each one having its individual good and bad effects! I am certain that I could make up a story, even if we don’t really understand all the effects.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: triangle.

Here is a side effect song, though not quite what I have in mind.

The photograph is my sister Chris and me, at my father’s 70th birthday, 2008, taken by my friend Malene.

Incomparable courage

I’ve chosen incomparable for today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt. Yesterday I posted one version of the song Waterbound. Rhiannon Giddens does the traditional version, but then I come across this song. Wow. And yes, such courage in people enslaved and there is still slavery in the world.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: incomparable.