If it don’t fit, don’t force it

Templates in primary care medicine suck.

Why? The problem with templates in primary care medicine is they focus on getting a specific list of questions answered for something like ear pain or back pain. They miss the weird stuff. They miss the outliers.

I hated the templates when we got our first electronic record in the early 2000s. The doctors who liked computers spent a year picking the system. Then they trained all the clinics for one week and we all went live. One of the biggest problems was that they liked computers and talked the language. We didn’t. We quit asking questions within a week, because when we asked a question it 1. Was a user problem and 2. They treated us like we were stupid and 3. They answered in Geek, which we did not understand.

We quit asking questions. The nurses and I all filed for workman’s comp because our shoulders locked up. Our shoulders hurt. We figured out how to get the stupid thing to work. Every doctor and nurse and PAC and nurse practitioner worked to figure it out on our own.

Two years later, they set up some standards for use. We resisted again, because they gave us orders in Geek and anyhow, we had no respect for them and we didn’t care. Change what we were doing? After no support for two years? Good luck!

It took me two years and three months to get the system to write what I considered a good clinic note. I had contacted an outside specialist three months in and asked how our notes were.

“You want me to be honest?” he said.

“Yes.”

“They suck. They are useless.”

“That’s what I thought.” I went on fighting the system and hating it. I won, eventually. Parts of my note continued to suck, but I figured out how to work around the stupid templates and put in some REAL information.

Now wait, you say, is the template totally useless?

In some situations, like emergency rooms, it may be very useful. It helps keep a harried ER team with four people from a car wreck from missing something. And if you are an ENT, otolaryngologist, you do see a lot of ear and mouth and throat things, so templates may help. But I think they are terrible for primary care.

They are good for billing, though. If you have all the boxes checked, the insurance company pays, and you can move on to the next victim. The insurance companies pay more if you see more people in a day. That is why our administration said, “See people for one thing per visit.”

However, that is not ethical. Say it is a 70 year old diabetic with atrial fibrillation on coumadin with a bladder infection. You cannot just say bladder infection and slap them on sulfa. For one thing sulfa screws up the coumadin and puts them at risk for bleeding. For a second, diabetes can affect kidney function and so can age and you have to adjust antibiotic dose for lower kidney function. For a third, if their glucose levels are out of control, the infection may not be controlled by an antibiotic. It’s not one thing. And the average patient has 4 chronic disorders in a study way back in the early 2000s. That means some people have none, some people have eight or more and most people have 3-5. Hypertension, diabetes, toe fungus, chronic shoulder pain, heart disease, the list goes on and on.

In any visit, I am alert for the things the DON’T fit. One time I am doing a new patient visit for back pain and note that she is hoarse. I bug her about the hoarseness. She admits it is continuous and has been there for two months. I do two referrals, because continuous hoarseness can be laryngeal cancer.

When she returns, she thanks me. She has vocal cord polyps, not cancer, but needs laser surgery. “You didn’t have to do that but you did.” she says. And do I feel good about not ignoring it? The visit went over time, but I’d rather go over time than miss laryngeal cancer, right?

We were taught to let the patient talk. Open ended questions. They’ve done studies that doctors cut people off from telling their stories very very quickly. If you let people talk, sometimes they say something that doesn’t fit the template, and we have to pay attention. Sometimes a comment or a couple comments are the clue, the key, the thing that doesn’t fit. Don’t force it into the template. Pay attention instead.

_______________________

The very serious group of people is a county medical meeting, 2014.

AI Oh

Old MacDonald has a ‘puter

A-I-A-I-O

And to this ‘puter he did mutter

A-I-A-I-O

With a mutter here and mutter there, here a mutter there a mutter, mutter butter fuddy dutter

Old MacDonald has a ‘puter

A-I-A-I- O!

Old MacDonald has a cell

A-I-A-I-O

The cell listens in full well

A-I-A-I-O

With an ad here an ad there, longer stronger 12 inch donger

Old MacDonald has a cell

A-I-A-I-O

Old MacDonald had a twitter

A-I-A-I-O

But the Chief Twit’s tweets got too bitter

A-I-A-I-O

Fire here fire there dumped and trumped everywhere

Old MacDonald had a twitter

A-I-A-I-O

Old MacDonald has an algorithm

A-I-A-I-O

His rhythm system slithers mythdom

A-I-A-I-O

Confusion here discrimination there mansplain what a pain cocaine human brain

Old MacDonald has an algorhythm

A-I-A-I-O

_____________

I think we could come up with LOTS more verses. The photograph is of Boa, my cat who died in 2020 at age 17.

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: mischief.

Keyboard supervisor

Elwha supervising me at the keyboard.

In high school I took typing for dummies. I was terrible at it and slow. Many women were avoiding typing classes in the late 1970s because they did not want to be secretaries. I wanted to be a writer and knew that I was a terrible typist. I also could not spell my way out of a paper bag. My mother was quite dyslexic and did not care. Once I had to sound out a word at the store from her grocery list: “LETIS”. Oh. Got it. Her letters are wonderful, not only interesting and creative spelling, but also wandering tenses and subjects.

We got our first electronic medical record in the early 2000s. We went from looking up labs on a computer and using a computer for maybe an hour total per day to full on eight hours a day. My shoulders and the nurses’ shoulders all locked up and we all filed for Workman’s Comp. I had to work with physical therapy to get my shoulders to unlock. My nurse pointed out that all problems were treated as “User Problems”. That is, WE were the problem, not the program. I realized that having the doctors who love computers pick out the program, learn about it for a year, and then teach us in two days and go live was a massive mistake. None of us understood it nor did we understand any of the computer lovers’ terminology. We rapidly quit asking questions because we didn’t like being treated as morons. Every person who was not a computer lover figured out their own work arounds. Two years later, the computer lovers tried to get us to standardize what we were doing. It’s not very surprising that we resisted and hated them. We had had to figure it out on our own with no help and we were very cynical and disbelieving that they would now “Make it easier.” Nope, they didn’t.

If I were to do it over again, the team picking the electronic medical records would include a couple of older doctors who hate computers. One of the selling points to the computer lovers was “you can write your own templates”. Our response was “We would rather be boiled in oil.” Three years after we got the system I asked the head computer lover doctor to write me a template. It was generic. Patient is complaining of (a problem) (more than one problem). The (problem) has been present for (a day, two days, a week, a month, a year, too long). The problem is (getting worse, the same, getting better). And so forth. Because we had all sorts of problems that did not have a template. My computer lover doc rolled his eyes, but set it up for me.

I also asked the clinic CFO WHY they didn’t set up typing lessons for the doctors who couldn’t type. I watched one of our group hunt and peck with two fingers. “You want them faster, right? You’ve said we could do the whole note in the room. How can they if they can’t type?”

“We are not giving them typing lessons.”

“Well, I think that’s misguided.” Ok, what I meant was that I thought it was STUPID.

Another selling point was that we could finish the note in the room. It turned out that I could do the note in the room after I had fought with the program for two years. It consistently took me 25 minutes. Then they ramped up the schedule and set us all at 20 minute visits. I started running late all the time. I told the front desk, “I’ve been told I should get the note done so I am. And if it takes me 25 minutes, that is what it takes.” Once the hospital kicked me out, I started my own clinic and did 30 minute visits. This did not make me rich but it made me a heck of a lot happier.

_________________

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: keyboard.

sending flowers

I was “separated” from a website for “not explicitly breaking the rules”. Hey, it’s a “woke” website and wow, I guess I was annoying, or the editors are insane, or something. The eds who had become friends over the years didn’t know a thing about it. The owner removed me.

Now I am removing every reference to that site from my blog, over time.

So here is a poem from a week ago, to “honor” the insane editors. I do think they need to vet them a little better, heh. But if the owner doesn’t mind the site imploding and dying, hey, he has chosen the best editors for the job.

______________________

Eeeeeeeeeew eww

eeeeeeeew eww
I’m annoyed at you
don’t you see you’re inconveniencing me?
don’t you see you shoot yourself in the knee?
don’t you see choices so dumb I could scream?
don’t you see
you’re destroying the dream

eeeeeeeew too
I’m so annoyed at you
but I’ll forgive you your sins
after I stick you with pins
and laugh many many grins
you’re sent to bed without dins

eeeeeeeeew too
I’m so annoyed at you
but I don’t really care
I think it’s totally fair
that you’re dissolving out there
in the cloud unaware
and no one else cares

eeeeeeeeew too
don’t cry a boohooo
you reap what you sow
I won’t cry when you go
sad to see you sunk so low
advertisment ho
drunk funked skunked bro
yeah, ed, he don’t know
sentimental slop woe
stinking slow to grow

eeeeeeeeew too
is yo owner a ghoul?
I think you raised up some fools
I mourn the loss of some jewels
when sad stupidity rules
some eds is fool mules
I carve yo gravestone with tools

Introducing

Two kittens arrived at my house on Monday. They were named Riffle (the black one) and Paddle (the tiger) so now are named Riffle Sol Duc and Paddle Elwa. They were a bit groggy from the hour drive and cautious at first. That lasted for no more than an hour.

First arrival.
Exploration.
Nap time.

Today is their fourth day and they are now exploring the living room and office. They were blocked off in the kitchen for the first two days.

I missed Boa Black terribly AND have caught five mice in the last two months.

Boa Black was 17 when she died. “Stop playing with the computer and pay attention to me.”

alternative medicine

Ok, I got this picture off Facebutt. I CONFESS. But I really want a doctor kit like this: so I can practice alternative medicine. I am disabled from Family Practice and I have to apply for disability payments (miles of paperwork) and I hear that even as a contractee I can apply for unemployment (miles more paperwork) and I see my hospital bill on line for the ER visit where I had chest pain and shortness of breath and the ER doc didn’t even give me an aspirin, so I want to know why I should pay them $900 and I am going to apply for reduced payments because last year I made 42 K, less then the nurses at Jefferson Healthcare (EVEN MORE PAPERWORK FOR THE REDUCED PAYMENTS) and really, it all sounds rather exhausting and I’d rather let the paranoia rise and hide under the bed. Where the OCD and ADHD will make me arrange the dust bunnies and dust elephants by size.

So this looks like a great doctor kit. If the patient sees me and doesn’t do a darn thing that I say, I shoot them with the gun in the forehead. If they do a little but not really very much, I set up the bowling pins and shoot them with the gun while I talk about how irritating it is to have patients use MY TAX DOLLARS though MEDICARE MEDICAID ACTIVE MILITARY DUTY AND THE VETERANS ADMINISTRATION NOT TO MENTION SOCIAL SECURITY DISABILITY to get advice and not follow it.

If they are merely disrespectful and tell me what Dr. Google says, I say “Duck.” and throw one at them. If they say, “I don’t take any farmasuiticals.” and bring a bag with the 12 supplement and vitamin pills they take daily, I give them the plastic pills to replace all their stupid supplements. “Here, take this. If it doesn’t work, I have suppositories, but they are four times this size so some people complain that they are uncomfortable.”

I am not sure WHAT the thing in the lower right corner is. A hair dryer? A fentenyl lollipop? Part of an old fashioned telephone?

Anyhow, someone find me one of these kits and send it to me. Pretty please. I am not allowed to do Family Medicine any more and really want to get started on Alternative Medicine.

Quota

Quota

honestly
I feel despair
when I try
to think about the new schedule

Twenty four slots
Of 20 minutes
See three people
For 40 minutes
Twenty on the schedule

Unanswered questions
Wake me on Sunday morning
If I am called to a labor patient
Must I make up that clinic face time?
What of holidays?
The clinic is closed.
Night call is nowhere addressed
Will they hire more and more
Who don’t take call
Until I am the last woman standing
Red rimmed eyes staring
Numb with fatigue

What of my nearly deaf patient
Who reads lips
May we take forty minutes?
All the fairly deaf elderly?
New parents, anxious
Questions pour out like
Coins from a jackpot win
What of the tearful brokenhearted
And anxious?
I shrink at the thought
Of crushing their hearts
Into twenty minutes

And what if I’m sick?
(sick leave & vacation all one)
It’s not a holiday if I’m on call
No make-up day off
If I cancel clinic
For illness
Do I make up those days
A quota of patient face days

I am in the factory
The mines
People are the shirts I must sew
The tons of coal I must load
I must meet a quota

Doctors die younger
Our life is measured out
In patients
I won’t let the quota
Kill my love

tech fan

We went downtown yesterday, walked, to the Kinetic Sculpture Race. They dress like clowns, but I have way more respect for the people at Kinetics than the US Senate.

There is a Maker Fair too, with the Robotics teams out and fundraising. The balls in the caught my eye. But it’s the very small tech fan that I admire. She is fascinated.

DSCN3997.JPG

I hope she has the opportunities. We need women in tech, in the Senate, in the House, in the Presidency.