Category Archives: rural doctor

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Lungs, again

I saw the pulmonologist from Swedish Hospital last week and am still thinking about the visit.

My lung function on the pulmonary function tests did not change much from December. He gives me an inhaler, with a steroid and a long acting bronchodilator, two puffs twice a day. I use it for one day in December and promptly get Covid-19 mildly. I then ignored the inhaler until I talk to him in March. He says, “Use it for two months and we will see if your lungs improve.” I try it in March and get a cold, not Covid, within a day. I try it again in April and get a cold within two days. I then ignore the inhaler.

But at the end of March I start feeling a lot better and my fast twitch muscles start working again. I would get very tired and stiff when I use them. They are “back” but are very weak. I wanted to know if my lung testing improved too, but it didn’t. So what is going on here? I feel better but the lung studies are not better.

The pulmonologist says, “Well, the infections are probably coincidence.” Yeah, um, well, three for three. “But, if it’s not asthma, it could be bronchiectasis.” He asks when I did the methacholine test, negative, gold standard for asthma. I did it in 2014. Negative along with allergy testing.

I don’t know much about bronchiectasis. Mostly that it’s not asthma and not chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. It may be the garbage can that holds obstructive disorders that don’t fit either of those categories.

“Bronchiectasis means what?” I say. He says, “Usually there is a lot of coughing and mucous.” Nope. Well, I cough a lot with pneumonia and with colds if I don’t rest, but rarely cough anything up. “The test is a chest CT but we can’t do anything about it if you have it, so I don’t know if you want to do a CT.”

“If there’s nothing to do, then I don’t want one.” Because repeated CT scans increase cancer risk, way more so then an x-ray. I ask about work. “I still get really fatigued, and my muscles are recovering. If I am stronger at the end of the summer, I would think about work, but how would I protect my lungs?”

“Mask.” he says. “An N95 all the time would maybe help. We don’t really know.”

Ugh. We agree that I will see him in October. If my fatigue level stays where it is now, returning to work even half days is going to be too high risk, I think. I am liable to get pneumonia AGAIN and this time I might get stuck on oxygen. Or die, which I’d rather not right now.

I am reading about bronchiectasis. The Mayo Clinic doesn’t have an entry for it, though it has clinical trials and a special clinic. That would support it being a garbage can diagnosis. I am reading on Wikipedia, here, not my usual medical resource. Brochiectasis can particularly be caused by tuberculosis, mycobacterial illness. They distinguish cystic fibrosis bronchiectasis from non-cystic fibrosis bronchiectasis and other infections can cause it. Influenza, streptococcus, um, yeah, the infections I’ve had. I do not have cystic fibrosis or the alpha-1-antitrypsis disorder. And there is another disorder listed, a genetic one where the cilia don’t work right. Primary ciliary diskinesia. I don’t have that either, but my working diagnosis is PANS, with antibodies that screw up my cilia and fast twitch muscles. And that would put my lungs at risk for pneumonia.

So, says a friend, what do you need to take?

Nothing, I say. It means I have to keep stress down, be in a parasympathetic state instead of fight or flight sympathetic state, and stay the heck away from sick people. Oh, and mask on airplanes and probably avoid huge crowd things. Jazz Fest, big music festivals, riots, wars, etc. Exercise, eat right, don’t drink too much alcohol, don’t smoke anything, don’t do stupid things. Try not to get tuberculosis.

And still, I am doing well. The treatment for really bad bronchiectasis is lung transplant. I am still quite mild after four pneumonias and the kid illnesses and mononucleosis and colds and so forth. I do not cough all the time and am off oxygen. It’s looking less likely that I could return to work in person, though I don’t know about internet. It really depends on my energy level, what that does. Darn it. Uncertainty, isn’t it hella annoying? Oh, well, I am pretty used to it by now.

And that’s the lung news.

I can always hide in my tree house. But the food and water supply there is not so good.

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Unvitiated

Wondering why vitiate
ads from drinking carbonate
seems a loaded silly freight
puzzle future centuries late
time foils stupid race hate
future can’t tell the state
from all attempts to carbon date

_________________________

For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: vitiate.

I look for songs with the word vitiate: pretty much heavy metal. Let’s go with this song instead:

We sang the lullaby in our last concert. It is gorgeous. Unvitiated.

I took the photograph this month at Kai Tai Lagoon.

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Sherbet skies

We sail on a jaunt into sherbet skies.
The water is gold, the wind is light.
The sky changes color and charms our eyes.
The light is gold sliding into the night.
The boat glides through the water with gentle ease.
Light hand on the tiller, our wake lights up.
We pass peaches and cherries and crackers and brie,
pour tea into each other’s cups.
It’s cooling off so we sit very close.
Phosphorescent creatures trail behind.
Warming each other as we steer the boat.
Darkness falls and we don’t mind.
The sherbet skies call us out to roam
But we are ready to come about towards home.

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For the Ragtag Daily Prompt: jaunt.

Hoping for more peace and tolerance on Juneteenth.

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The work of disability

I look up the CDC website to see how many people are disabled. The CDC says that 27% of adults in the US have a disability. Yes, that is one in four. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/disabilityandhealth/infographic-disability-impacts-all.html.

I find being disabled to be a ton of work.

I think the view of disability in the US is often people who sit at home and have money thrown at them from the government.

This is not so, not so, no, no, no.

In clinic a patient needs a new socket for his artificial leg, having had a cancer amputation. He is an expert still working in disability exams, so we do a visit where he dictates much of my note, because in order to get a new socket, medicare requires very specific information in the clinic note. We also have notes from physical therapy and his occupational therapist and the company that makes the sockets. Why does he need a new one? He has lost weight and the old one doesn’t fit any more so he can’t walk securely.

Even so, I think it took six months and we kept redoing versions of the paperwork.

Another patient needs a new electric wheelchair. That one takes a year of repeating insistence and paperwork.

After my March 2021 pneumonia, I am disabled, which pisses me off. I like my work. It’s unclear how long I will be on oxygen and since we’ve been working on a diagnosis besides “gets pneumonia super easily” since 2003, it’s hard to predict the trajectory. I don’t know if I will be on oxygen permanently. It is exhausting to drag myself to physician visits, in four different hospital systems. Oh, and a patient can apply for patient assistance with the finances, but then all four have different paperwork. I am sick as snot and have to try to keep track of the bills from four systems and four sets of on line passwords and where is the stupid appointment? Edmonds? Seattle? Bremerton? Augh. The fatigue that accompanies the pneumonia makes it hard to cook, hard to clean, hard to comprehend bills, exhausting to make phone calls. Anyone want to trade? I’ll work and you can be disabled?

My disability company requires paperwork too, lots of it, and my taxes, and there is a long list of rules that I reread periodically. I needed an attorney to sort out the rules, since the disability company won’t answer my questions.

Now I am off oxygen and better, though still dogged by fatigue. I think that is probably permanent, but then I sometimes hope it’s just that I am finally rebuilding muscle, since the fast twitch muscles didn’t work for two years. They are a bit recalcitrant now.

And I am not in a wheelchair, have not had an amputation, am not in a rehab. If you have to take buses in your wheelchair everywhere, need two people and a crane to get you out of bed into the wheelchair, have to use a computer to talk for you, imagine. Anyone who thinks disability is easy money is insane.

It’s not clear if I can return to work. I might get pneumonia number five, which would probably take me out. No one knows how to lessen my risk. And I don’t have the energy and do not know if I will.

All the unknowns and unclears and we don’t knows. No one is disabled for easy money because it’s a job trying to get well or trying to survive it. And yet, I am happy to be alive and even to be able to dance some! Dance on!

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Forever or not?

Once someone has cancer, do they have it forever?

I think that is a complex question. But one example comes to mind.

An older woman, in her early eighties, is seeing me. She wants to go back on hormone replacement.

“But you have a history of breast cancer.” I say.

“That was six years ago. And I took that horrible tamoxifen for 5 years and I still am having hot flushes after a year off it and I am sick of it. Give me hormones.”

“Hmmm.” I say. “Let me do some research.”

I call the oncology group south of us. This is over ten years ago when we had no oncologists in our county.

“How old is she?” Her oncologist is digging up her records. “Ok, got her. Hmmm. Well, she had a stage one cancer and a lumpectomy and five years of tamoxifen. THAT cancer is gone, for sure. If she wants hormone replacement, it puts her at a bit more risk for a new breast cancer, but the old one is gone. As long as she understands the risk.”

My patient is back and we negotiate. “Ok, the oncologist says your previous cancer is truly gone, but hormones put you at risk for a new breast cancer. At least, raise your risk a little.” Age is the biggest risk in women, if they do not have the abnormal BRCA I or II genes. “Also, if we have you on hormones, you have to do your mammogram, because I’d want to catch any cancer early. That’s the deal.”

“Fine, I want the hormones.” She signs a consent that I’ve prepared and we put her back on her hormone replacement.

“I want to hear from you, ok? Whether it works?”

She calls in a week, delighted. “No more hot flushes! I feel great!”

__________

I took the photograph at Mats Mats Bay last week. There is a sign about osprey nests. I look up and think, oh, yes! Pretty obvious if you look up!

__________

I don’t remember her exact age and I don’t remember if the five years was tamoxifen or one of the other hormone blockers. She could have been in her seventies. At first I thought, no way back on hormones! Then I thought, quality of life is important. Maybe I choose this photograph because the nest is out on a limb.

Some cancers ARE currently forever, especially those that are stage III or IV and metastatic. Maybe they won’t always be forever.